Keys, Coke and Coach purses: Don’t cry over spilt milk

Guest post by Jen Hayton (Waterloo, Ontario, Canada)

I have certain rituals in the morning.

The first is that I carry 2 cans of Coke in my purse to work, which I drink immediately upon arriving. My coworkers know I have arrived when they hear the sound of me opening the first can as I sit down at my desk.

The second is that when I get out of my car in the morning, I grab my keys, lock the door, put the keys in my purse, and then seconds later make sure my keys are in my purse, and not in the locked car (the reason why is another story for another day…).

This morning, I was rushing. I overslept, I was running late and I was frazzled. But I knew I’d be feeling better thanks to ritual #1…I could practically taste it.

Onto ritual #2, grab the keys, lock the car, keys in purse, have second thoughts about existence of keys in purse. Open purse – see 2 cokes blocking all else from view. Remove cokes from purse – Ah my sweet delicious coke…

I crack one open and take the first sip. Find keys, put the other coke in purse. As I reach my desk, I take my second sip and taste not the sweet nectar but instead metal. Inspecting the can, I quickly troubleshoot the problem – it’s not open. That’s strange, I thought, I was pretty sure I already opened – oh no…

Sure enough, there was an empty can and about 350 ml of Coke in the bottom of my brand new Coach purse. I froze, unsure of what to do – do I mourn my purse or my Coke? Do I cry or shout profanities? Could I do both?

In the end, I did neither. I went to the bathroom, cleaned my purse, and occasionally laughingly explained my stupidity to those who threw a strange look my way. Then, I made my way to my desk and cracked open Coke #2, ready to begin the rest of my day.

What did I learn? Don’t put an open can of Coke in my purse, obviously. But also I learned the expression, “Don’t cry over spilt Coke milk”. Sure, it sucked. And yes, it was completely my own stupid fault. But it had already happened and getting upset wouldn’t undo that – so instead of stewing about it and ruining the rest of my day, I moved on.

Jen is married with two beautiful kids, and has a glamourous and exciting career as an accountant. The above are her justifications for her reliance on caffeinated beverages. Her purse is a little worse for wear but ok.

Got a lesson you learned from one of life’s absurd moments that you want to share? Click here to submit your story.


Funny stories. Good advice. Check out my books, “Simple(ton) Living: Lessons in balance from life’s absurd moments.” and “Balancing Priorities and Prioritizing Balance”. Click here to learn more and to purchase a copy. Thanks!

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3 Responses to Keys, Coke and Coach purses: Don’t cry over spilt milk

  1. Jokes Are GOOD says:

    Nothing talks about living on less more than an article about coke and coach purses. Ah…the simple life.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Are you fucking stupid you mourne the $150+^^ purse instead of a stupid ass coke WTF

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